a rant about something that i'm sure you've all come across. it concerns the difference between swedish and english in the area of vowels. as most of you are no doubt aware, there are more vowels in swedish than there are in english, more specifically the notorious triumvirate of åäö. also, in swedish we consider y to be a vowel whereas those english dudes consider it a half-vowel at best. it's a puzzling letter to be sure, but the point of this rant is å, ä and ö. you see, even though they look remarkably similar to some other vowels that exist in english (a and o, i'm looking in your general direction), they are in fact different vowels. different letters, different pronunciations, different pretty much everything. yes yes, i know that historically the å is an a with an o on it and pronounced somewhere in between, and i know that an ä is considered an a with an umlaut. but i'd still like to claim that they are separate vowels. people here don't mistake å's for a's. this is because they are different vowels. not that hard, is it? even dudes in metal bands should be able to figure this one out, right? well, i'm sure you've all heard of motörhead and mötley crüe and rolled your eyes, but this aspect of the issue seems like it's been done to death already. just check out this for some serious dot-related humour. i tried to find a picture of the tour t-shirt, but didn't in five seconds and then gave up. whilst looking, i came across a wikipedia article with the name "heavy metal umlaut", which indicates that this topic has been adequately covered already, and so i shall waste no more space on it.
in the above paragraph i hinted that dudes in metal bands were of low intelligence; i apologize for this and as we shall soon see, people in other areas do not seem to be smarter. i turn you now to a picture i took in a design store in sydney.
perhaps it is not clear on the small version of the picture, but click on it and enjoy all the glory of a "Stockhölm" teapot. to indicate that it is from scandinavia you have to put dots on at least on of the vowels, right? otherwise people might not understand that we are selling authentic scandinavian design here! because people have no idea what or where stockholm is. now, i'm not swedocentric enough to expect everyone in the world to obviously know that stockholm is the swedish capital city, but i do think it's a name strong enough to hold its own without the help of dots to indicate its scandinavian-ness. also, what is up with only putting dots on one of the o's? if you put them on one, you've already established that you don't care that they are different vowels altogether, so why not go all out with your foreign branding strategy and leave nothing to ambiguity when you name your product? with the name "Stockhölm", most people will think it's scandinavian, some people will think you are an idiot for putting dots where they don't belong and some people will be completely oblivious to all the mighty viking-ness allusions you are trying to convey in your teapot. if you instead name it "Stöckhölm" (or perhaps "STÖCKHÖLM" for slightly more viking-ness) some of the oblivious people might get the hint whereas no one would think you were even more of an idiot - a definite win-win situation.
when i buy shampoo, deodorant, soap and similar products, there are at least twenty different options that will do the job. they all look remarkably similar. they have names like "arctic", "cool", "sport" and so on, and i usually choose depending on what kind of image i want to convey for the day. if i feel sporty the day i happen to be buying shower gel, i will buy the one that says "sport" (as long as it's also cheap); if i feel arcticy, i will buy the "arctic" one. i don't want to waste my time on inconsequential things like picking a shower gel, i just want to get it over with, so i'm using this method just to have something to base a quick decision on. but once, again in sydney, the decision was easier than normal. a picture is enclosed below, enjoy the spectacular setting.
yes, it is a deodorant called "Norscä" and it has the scent "forest fresh". i don't think i have much to add, the picture pretty much speaks for itself. in a kumadude-esque manner i'd like to close off this post with yet another picture, this time of a coffee shop that also sells ice cream, also in sydney. on a side note, the coffee shop was named "coffee t", which inspired an endless number of mr. t jokes between me and rachel. anyway, picture:
3 comments:
As someone working for a company aspiring to bring Scandinavian design to the Japanese masses, not to mention one that carries a line of products called 'Stockholm' (a sadly teapot-less line, for some unthinkable reason), I can only be inspired to let the people making the decisions know what they're missing by not naming it STÖCKHÖLM. When next you come to Japan, my friend, that new and improved line will be the first thing you see at the airport. Here's hopin'.
Also: Mr T!
today i saw the one that tops them all ... an "h" with an umlaut. i don't know where people can go from here, i just don't.
an ¨h! my keyboard cannot do this! surely these people have technology more advanced than we could ever dream of.
the kuma: i would truly love to see that. do you have any 'ins' into the naming department? i'd love to know more about it, such as how many people work full-time with just coming up product names. also, now i expect a fully dotted ikea next time i go to japan. that would rock it. here's also hopin'.
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